“The sea does not reward those who are too anxious, too greedy, or too impatient. One should lie empty, open, choiceless as a beach – waiting for the gift from the sea.” ~Anne Morrow Lindbergh

That quote was on my tear off calendar one day last week. I’ve been writing what I am grateful for at the end of each day on the backs of these calendar pages and placing them in my gratitude basket. I wrote my note on the back of the page that day but I have not placed it in my basket yet. I wanted to think on that quote some more.

My peaceful place has always been near the ocean. When I am there I feel God’s presence like nowhere else. I can relax on a blanket and listen to the crashing waves all day long allowing my worries to wash away. I crave that feeling. For now I go sit by the river but that is not the same. It doesn’t have the same power as the ocean. The river is predictable. The ocean seems to have a mind of it’s own.

The quote reminded me of my approach to life in my past. Patience has never been a virtue of mine. When I was not sure what to do next in the past, I created my own way. In doing so I failed to listen to my gut when my choices didn’t feel quite right, yet I continued. “I will make this work.” Relationships, jobs, real estate purchases, last minute vacations with people I barely knew, marriages with people I barely knew…big stuff. I wasn’t walking with God back then so I wasn’t listening for Him. His voice is in those gut feelings you get that tell you something is off. “Do not pass go. Do not collect $200.” Yet I zoomed on by anyway. I failed at listening. I might not have gone directly to jail as in the Monopoly game but I ended up there eventually stuck wondering how I ended up in such a mess. I was anxious, greedy, and impatient.

Psalm 27:14 “Wait on the Lord, be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart. Wait, I say, on the Lord.”

Amen.

I had conversations with three different people last week about waiting on the Lord. I am still in a state of limbo with my employment situation. I have a few options, yet I am not sure which one is right. I am not waiting for a big red truck to drive by with a sign on it telling me what to do. I don’t think God is going to send an Angel to speak to me with the answer. My faith is strong though and I just pray for discernment because although I have options, I want to make the best choices for my life now. I do not have time to make decisions based on a whim anymore. I am almost 44, not 24. God has closed some doors and I trust He will open some new ones. There could actually be several possible doors that I could walk through that would be a good choice. But this time I am listening for that inner voice that says yes or no. Go or wait.

I am lying “empty, open, choiceless as a beach – waiting for the gift from the sea.” Because God’s timing is perfect.

Blessings,

Stacey ~ iamalive