Today I’m sharing a glimpse into the life of my 24 year old friend. I read Brandy’s post on Instagram this morning and I had no idea she was feeling quite this way lately. It was honest and inspiring and it made me think about the hills and valleys of life. She and I are in different seasons and I am twice her age, but I so related to her words. The key is to keep moving forward no matter how you feel even when the path isn’t exactly clear.
Happiness is a journey, not a destination. Cliche? Maybe. But after 40+ years of trying to figure it out, I do believe it’s true. It is not achieved by having a perfect relationship, acquiring degrees, landing a job, or surrounding yourself with material things. It’s achieved when you appreciate the moment you are in right now. Because even in the valley there is something good. And because of God’s grace, we always have the chance to start climbing that mountain and begin again.
Stacey ~ iamalive
I should be so happy right now. I just started a new job, I am about to graduate…I should be on top of the world but I’m not. I imagined that once I reached this point in my life, I’d feel differently but now that I’m reaching some of my goals, it isn’t enough. I’ve been in a state of perpetual anxiety for the last three years trying to do everything I can to be the best that I can be. In that process, I have literally dropped all of my creative outlets. I keep doing the same things at the same places and I feel lonely so often because I don’t reach out to people on any real level. I don’t take care of myself even though I act like I do and I give people good advice that I don’t follow. I have been feeling fed up and I’ve been isolating myself. I haven’t been answering texts. I have even shut myself off from my husband because I know something isn’t right but I’ve let myself feel helpless like this is how I’m going to feel forever.
Today, my brother-in-law and his girlfriend came to visit and we did a rune reading. I drew an Inguz after thinking about my problems. It is the rune of isolation or separation in order to create a space or place where the process of transformation into higher states of being can occur. This made me think about how I’ve known I need to make some changes in my life for a while but haven’t. I make up excuses and surround myself with things I should have let go a long time ago and I hold on to negative thoughts about myself over events that are long over. I have bad habits that I wallow in and I am addicted to stress. I will never reach a higher self if I don’t make some changes.
I am committing to finishing the things that I have started to make room for what I have been neglecting. I have a great life that I’m grateful for. I need to start appreciating it and I need to utilize everything in my toolbox to grow on the inside. Time to tie-up the loose ends and begin again.